10 ‘Tongue in Cheek’ Things You Must Do Now You Own a Horse
It’s like a gang, a club, a jam-packed bustling community of muddy horse goers that have had their heartbeat replaced with a hoof beat – we are of course talking about horse owners…
Once you’re in, you’re hooked, and there’s no going back!
So to help you along, now you own a horse, here are 10 things absolutely every horse owner must do to earn their stripes;
1. Never leave any Facebook Meme untouched; whether you like, share or comment every single last one must be accounted for.
2. Enter every competition you see, and join at least 300 FB groups to do with horses.
3. You’ll need at least three of everything – get your bank card at the ready.
4. Visit your local supermarket wearing a pair of knee-high (muddy) riding boots along with a pair of cream jodhpurs, a jacket and some sort of heavily branded polo shirt.
5. Set your tv to record your fav soaps as chances are you won’t be arriving home till gone 9pm, as your horse had a meltdown over a grid he’s walked past almost a million times.
6. Sign up to as many equestrian publications, newsletters and websites as you can, so you can’t see the important emails for looking; for what William Fox-Pitt does on a daily basis is now life, anything else is merely insignificant.
7. Ask the bank for a £100,000 overdraft with a 50-year repayment plan, as you (well, your horse) is going to need it.
8. Cancel gym memberships, social gatherings and any other events you have planned that aren’t anything to do with horses, as you’re going to be too filthy and exhausted throughout winter to do anything.
9. Anticipate your horse’s every move, know your limits, and inevitably be prepared to push those limits on a daily basis when taking your horse out to the field, especially in spring!
10. Lastly, yet most importantly, enjoy and love your horse, for he will probably be the best friend you’ve ever had.
This is very much a tongue-in-cheek piece which we had a giggle putting together as we still do most of the points above daily. We are all, of course, individuals and only ever mean the very best to people around us, our horses and those in our equestrian family.
Looking for a new horse or pony? Why not browse our equestrian classifieds?
Suzanne Ashton, Founder of Everything Horse (Est, 2012), has a BA Hons in Marketing Management and a Diploma in Equine Science. Suzanne has ridden and owned horses all her life and has twelve years of experience in marketing, writing, design, SEO, and website creation.