9 Funny Things Horse Owners Do Without Realising

Horse owners (we) love our equines dearly, non-horsey folk mainly think we are crazy as the commitment, hard work and patience required to look after such an animal is a major responsibility. But for us? It’s a lifestyle, not a hobby.

Here are 9 funny things we do, as owners of horses, that we’re not always completely aware of until after the event – of course, it’s all for the giggles …

1. Reward bad behaviour
   We’ve all done it – patted him/her like crazy with continuous amounts of praise “good boy/good girl’ we bleat (in a shakey tone) while our horse plays up, spins around, runs through us in order to make it out to their field mates who had been turned out only 5 minutes before – making us look completely incompetent.
2. Unintentionally feed rocket-fuel
   Hands up (we will) to those who have changed feed and found the horse has gone from zero to the hero being led to the field, on a hack or when schooling? But it said ‘non-fizz’ on the packet you call – we here you, we really do …
3. Out-horse ourselves
   How many times has the ‘I’ll just learn to ride it’ come out of your mouth when trialling a horse you fell in love with at first sight? Ad normally reads ‘16.3hh bay, needs re-schooling, quirky and not for a novice ride – should be in five figure mark’.
4. Unnecessary shopping
   When you enter the tack shop for a hoof pick, instead you end up buying a 6,000,000g turnout rug for your unclipped horse, a pair of sparkly tendon boots, a feed bowl, mane & tail spray, hoof oil and some treats … thus leaving without the hoof pick.
5. Buying too many horses
   One gets lonely, two breeds separation anxiety, three means your skint for the rest of your life and four means you’ll probably be living in your wagon before the year is out (if you don’t have to sell it for a 1982 modelled caravan).
6. Matchy-Matchy Over Kill
   If you’ve got one set of matchy-matchy, you’ll have at least 10! Each set includes (without exclusion);
   • headcollar
   • lead rope
   • fly veil
   • bandages
   • saddle pad
   • base layer
   • hat cover
   • riding leggings
   • Gloves … none of which are ever used altogether unless someone gets their camera out
7. Throw out far too much bedding and blame it on the horse being ‘dirty’
   Are mares really that wet? Or do we just use this as an excuse to buy more overpriced shavings, which we break our back to muck out each day, sieving out every last piece of horse poo, before levelling the bed off to complete perfection (another Instagram worthy photo opportunity coming to your page soon).
8. Keeping broken items of tack
   Who knows, we may always need to use that broken cheek piece again (said no horse owner ever) and a broken surcingle is always good to have lying around for 3-4 years – we may find a use for it someday, but probably not.
9. Rug Washing and Repairs
   I’ll sort that one out next week – enough said…

But, when all’s said and done, we’ve our horses’ best interests at heart – yet nothing in the bank.

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